- my essay is too prolix , please make it concise
- my essay looks tedious, please make it vivid ,so admission committee can feel fresh and have a good impression.
- my word choice is pretty bad, please help with words and replace with more suitable ones.
- I am no good at punctuation, so this might be a problem.
- My start and ending does not sounds attractive.
- Last but not least , I am not good at praise myself , so please embellish my essay and make my statement stand out as a much better student than it now seems like.